The snap decision to disembowel a woman in Cardiff was defended by Mutilations Minister Emily Avery today.Avery, head of the powerful Ministry of Mutilations and Harm, told MPs that her decision to disembowel the mother of three in Tescos carpark, Cardiff, was impromptu but “not exceptional”.
Responding to bypassers who accused her of atrocious barbarism, and to judges who called the disembowelment arguably disgusting, she said, “These are incredibly difficult mutilations. I disembowel hundreds of people each year for insults ranging from their place-of-birth to having fallen on hard times. It is one of the things that makes being a government minister with diplomatic immunity and earnings five orders of magnitude above the minimum wage such an incredibly tough job. The decision to gut this lady was literally heartrending but not exceptional. I saw her trip on a kerb and instinct took over; I just moved in for the kill.”
The disembowelment comes in a week that has seen the wealthy minister burn off the thumbs of a nun and squirt a lost boy’s face with vitriol.
Judges say there is little they can do to stop Ms. Avery once she is on a spree.
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