Tuesday 18 September 2007

Fire at Mesmerists’ Ball Claims Police Reserve

(Flammable magnetism: looters espy the head of a mesmerist swollen with fire and self-importance.)

Opposition leader Mary Ludi has called on the government to launch a full public inquiry into the fire at last year’s Mesmerists’ Ball.

The fire, which cost the lives of over a hundred practitioners of the mesmeric arts, was aggravated by the powerful currents of animal magnetism released by the dying hypnotists’ minds. Firecrews were often immobilised, or compelled to act out their desires, while police lost all reserve, regressing to the age of twelve, or beyond; a nearby journalist relived an earlier life as Queen Nefertiti, and paramedics could only look on, mesmerised, as flames licked the nostalgic, rosy-hued building.

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