Time Bombs Trap News Staff in 10-min Loop

LONDON: Four massive time bombs have exploded in Broadcasting House, headquarters of the BBC, this morning, in what is believed to have been a co-ordinated terrorist attack.

The blasts ripped through the heart of Department X, where the prestigious BBC 24 twenty-four hour news programme is produced, tearing up the fabric of time. As yet no attempt has been made to reach some 500 000 staff trapped in the rubble.

“The employees are unhurt, as far as we can tell, but they seem to be snared in a temporal loop,” said Whig Star, temporal head of London’s Metropolitan Police. “It would be folly to break the seal till we know what we’re up against.”

Police Psychologists are standing by for when, or if, the bubble bursts: “We’re particularly concerned for the wellbeing of newsreaders, who have been reading the same three items non-stop now for the better part of a day,” said psychologist Jeanette Saruman, who had wished to remain anonymous.

“One concerns a couple walking down an ordinary road, another deals with BBC coverage of this walking, and the third is about their own coverage of that coverage. We urge members of the public to switch off now for the sake of their own minds, or if that isn’t possible - because elderly relatives want it leaving on for company - at least try to talk over it and crack gentle meteorological jokes.”